Kurdt @ 5

Yesterday is our lil boy's day. He's now in his 5th month. I bought him cake but never had a chance to take pictures of him. When I got home, he's fast as sleep. then when he woke up at around 7pm, he just asked for a milk then go back to sleep. Below is the only pictures i got when i put him in his cradle or rocking chair. My husband put Kurdt in this chair for him to be comfortable when he watch TV. So nice to see him during these times..

Ang suplado! he didn't even give us smile while taking pictures of him. He really want to be in bed.. So sleepy.. we are not even done yet getting some pics when he cried and fall asleep. Well, end of his 5th month day i think..

Goodnight my angel... Sleep tightly..

March 31st, that is the time i got a picture of our lil boy for his Bday.

We even tried to took a picture of him while riding on his cousin's horse (toy).

Anyway, we are expecting more changes of him in his 5th month.. Kurdt is learning much and i hope i am with him in his every "first" that im always excited though.

Moving On..

It was so hard to move on specially if your still holding on to that someone.. when you are still missing every moment you had to that person.. and there are things
that you wish you have done so the time he/she still with you.

What I Miss??:

1. Cooked a special lunch/dinner for my visit
2. Do all the kwento's and tsismis as well
3. having a manicure/pedicure together
4. Making lambing to bring her food at any time
5. Scolding me as well, during "those times"
6. when i do make sumbong to her haaay (madalas)
7. kwentuhang walang katapusan (anything under the sun)
8. Our family dinner in any occasion especially during those times that
she still have apetite and cravings for food
9. Baking and cooking Time (that i wish i have that cooking /baking skills that you have)
10. Lastly, your voice.. that i really miss :(


what i wish i have done?

1. make more time for her
2. bring her to any place she/he has never been before, specifically Enchanted (weird no? Plans that we never had a chance to do)
3. bring our Kurdt to her more often
4. gave her enough support for her hospitalization/medication
5. give everything that she needs that i know i could
6. call/text her more often
7. give all the luxury in life (haaay)
8. didn't gave her any trouble or heartache
9. make her more proud of me
10. lastly, kiss, hug and say to her how much i treasure and love her

Who i am referring to? ofcourse, my beloved mom. Time passed by so fast and we are now heading to her 40 days, but still my heart ache everytime i
remember her. I didn't realize that my tears fall down while writing this one.. but still glad thinking that she's silently at one corner knowing that i miss her.

Im still here, on my own journey.. but im sure someday.. our paths will cross again.. someday.. see you then mom... love you

PlaNs fOr tHe HoLiDaYs

We will be spending our Holidays at home back in Valenzuela

April 2 (Holy Monday) - My mom's 40 days
April 3 (Holy Tuesday) - Kurdt's 2nd 5 in 1 vaccine
April 4 (Holy Wednesday) - I will join my brother in his visit to our dentist
April 5 (Maundy Thursday) - Swimming Time! I wish to visit any beach/pool resort nearby.
April 6 (Good Friday) - Not sure yet, Im still looking for someone who could cover for my shift.

Poor bebi (my husband), he's on call for April. I dont know if he could be with us on these days and on..

I know, if my mom still here.. she will be eager and super kulit for us to join them in her vacation going to our province (Bicol). The last time i spoke with her, she asked me if we (Kurdt, Nicko and Me) could have a vacation from our work during the holy week.. she's really planning to go home this year.. Well, that will not be possible these days i know (sigh)..

But still, ill be joining my family for the rest of the holidays.. Thats a relief for me though!

Missing my Baby

Morning and Graveyard shift sucks! With this shift, i missed every moment with my lil Kurdt. I wasn't able to give him bath, put him into sleep at noon, play with him, seeing him in his cry time..being the first one to know new tricks he learned.. waaah i do missed him a lot!

When i got home, thinking i could be with him even for a short period... Play with him, hug him, sing him a lullaby till i put him into sleep, take a nap beside him at night (which is the best part i think) and then i failed... it hurts me more!

Thinking about it makes me cry sometimes.. when got a free time but i cant be with my son.. though i cant blame others to like my son much and even kidnapped my baby for the day.. My point is, most of the time, im in the office.. 10-15 hours (travel time included) i left my baby at home.. So, can you spare this time for me???

We are still lucky to have someone taking good care of our son when we cant.. maybe im just afraid that time will come, he will not recognize me as his own mom coz i spend most of my time working! It scares me thinking that i cant even make him stop cry and make him feel safe with me.. If that happens, I will die in pain!

Greatest nightmare: My son will be taken away from me (sigh)

just a thought.. Can i stop working and stay home taking care of our son??? hahaha No way! i dont think i could live a life like that either.. haayyyy

I need a break.. again i think.. :)

Bonus Plus

Last week, my brother bought a PS2 in greenhills with his girlfriend. From then on, my husband keeps on bugging me for us to get one. He even bought a fan and ps2 games for my brother. I got an interest with Soulcaliber and God of War 2 but im hoping that i could play it better the next time.

A friend/officemate of mine offer to sell his ps2 in a low price but he suddenly backed out. At the end, ive been convince by nicko to get a new unit of PS2 instead. We bought a silver edition slimline PS2. Hmm not bad, a difference of 2k from my friend's offer, and we got a new unit.

It cost a thousands (thinking our savings) but atlest i got something from my bonus. And the best part of it? My husband will stop making me kulit! btw, Nicko would like to buy that unit intentionally for our lil kurdt "daw" (wink).

I also have something for myself last night... a pair of sandal !!! yehey!! It is a 2 inch heels sandal from Linea Italia. It just weird that it is not that nice at the picture but surely, its worth the price.

See the difference between me and my husbands interest? hehehe

My Baby At 4!

i just want to tell the whole world that "hey i have a cute lil boy!" Everybody is asking everytime they saw my lil kurdt if she's a gurl.. and i will answer them back "no, he's a boy" (are you damn idiot? he's wearing blue from top to bottom!) ofcourse that is just at the back of my mind.. hehehe

Sometimes, i must admit, our kurdt has a touch of a girls' face... so last saturday, i borrow the dress we bought for his cousin and put it on him.. look at him..

Whose saying that im a girl????

This picture was taken last sunday, kurdt with lolo mundo trying to make lil steps... yup, he's taking some lil steps.. he's beginning to practice his steps, sitting in his own, shouting like making stories and sometime, trying his best sa pag dapa.. hehe

btw, he's also a bed invader! sya ang me ari ng kama nmen.. hehe sobrang likot matulog... but i will just smile seeing both of my bebi's sleeping peacefully, while kurdt is listening to the snoring lullaby of his dad. haaayyy that is one of my reasons why i came to office late for my shift. As if the bed is pulling me back beside of the most important person in my life now... kurdt and my husband... I love you guys...

Dress for Less

Wednesday morning.. im super damn late.. got my time in at exactly 7:02AM (supposedly, my shift start at 5AM)But still dont know how to start my day.. just sit and stare blankly at my laptop, thinking whats next should be done within the next hour.. I didn't have enough sleep last night. I came home late (around 12:30AM), coz i have to attend our weekly team meeting.Actually, it was my fault staying late in the officewaiting for my ex-boyfriend(husband). Our meeting ended around 9:30pm. Anyway, harm has been done, im late..

Yesterday, Rema and I sneak out in Glorietta to look for a dress or a gown to be used for the upcoming event here in our office (ECSC anniversary). First thing in our mind is Cinderella who offers nice dresses just perfect for the party. Unfortunately, nothing to be found or i could say, our budget didn't fit the dress that we want to have.
So we planned to visit other mall instead as we failed to find one. We are headed back to office when we decided to walk in one of the boutique in Glorietta 1. The shop called itself Edgar Allan Shop. The boutique offers wedding gowns, Formal dresses, Casual dresses, bags and sandals. They also offers what is needed in such event like weddings,like invitations and rings for the couple.

After several minutes making "usyoso" on their designer's cut dresses, presto! we found a perfect dress for us. For Rema, the more daring the dress is, the best fit it is for her.. hehehe joke!But kidding aside, the dress is much pretier than what we've seen in cinderella (we think!) and much cheaper (naka SALE kse) hehehe it is a shining glittering splendid dress for the party! hahaha

Still ends up in in 1 question that keeps on bugging me.. "will i be going to the party?" still not decided yet mahgad..

You will be missed.. Mom

Kurdt experience his first heartache when his mama la passed away last Feb 22. It was just so sad thinking that my mom just enjoyed her apo (grandson) for as early as 4 months.Mom, my family (nicko, kurdt and I) love you soo much and we'll be missing you for sure.Please take all the sad and happiest memries of our family with you in your next journey.

We will make sure that Kurdt, as he grew up, will recognize you and be reminded that once in his life, he has his mama la hold him tight and love him so dearly. Bye mom.. love you